I wrote this a while ago but it’s amazing to see how relevant it continues to be. At least six migrant children have died in U.S. custody since this piece was written; also, not all parents and children have been united to date. Please use your vote wisely in 2020!
How could we?
In June of 2014, my family was headed to London to celebrate my mother-in law’s 80th birthday. Because of a process delay with my husband’s passport, we found out the day we were leaving that my husband could not travel with us. It was a very long journey to England without my husband; even though my children knew that their dad will join us in a couple of days it was still a very devastating experience for them. They cried throughout the flight, and when we arrived my older son experienced an asthma exacerbation due to stress. Thankfully, my friend/ sister – a nurse practitioner, had all we needed to not land in a hospital. My boys cried throughout the entire church service on the day of their grandmother’s celebration because they missed their dad. My heart ached because it didn’t matter what I said, they were just inconsolable. Every single inquiry about their father triggered a new crying episode. I felt helpless to see my children so sad and miserable. It was the longest two days of my life and maybe theirs as well, but all I could do was pray for my husband to arrive safely and quickly.
When my husband finally arrived I was happy to see him not just for the fact that he made it safe and sound, but also for his children’s emotional well being. There are no words to express the boys’ emotional switch when they saw their father. They became lively and their entire demeanor changed; it was so noticeable that people couldn’t help but comment about the connection between the boys and their father. The rest of the vacation went without a hitch and my sons were in their glory basking in the love, strength and reassuring company of their father. One thing’s for sure, they will never forget what happened; even though it was painful for them, they had their mother, family and friends who loved, consoled and cared for them until their hero arrived.
As a perpetual optimist I believe that America still has a soul; therefore, regardless of your political or religious affiliation, ripping families apart is inhumane and inconsistent with life. It is not okay! I’m all for border security and common sense immigration reform but the “U.S. Separation Policy” implemented by the current administration is definitely not that. This is destroying children and their families. This will have a much more prolonged impact that’s inconceivable at the moment. I have been haunted by the ProPublica audiotape released recently where one could hear the chaos of children crying because they’re missing their parents and guardians. Even though the focus was on a six year old girl who was inquiring relentlessly about the whereabouts of her aunt, my heart ached for a young boy who wept bitterly while asking for his “Papi.” One must listen to the tapes to understand the full context of what’s happening. I couldn’t help but weep for the emptiness and pain these parents and children must be feeling. These are human beings in their own right. Why rip the kids from the parents? Why not keep them together and follow due process? Why traumatize them? Is this supposed to serve as a deterrent? Research has shown time and again what early childhood trauma does to children and how it’s promulgated into adulthood. Why inflict this upon an entire group of people. What hurts the most is that some people are okay with this sort of treatment of another. As the crying children were being recorded, one could hear the distinct voice of a male saying “this is an orchestra we’re just missing a conductor.” How could he? Oh so cold! The fact that biblical verses (Romans 13) used to justify slavery are being used in this instance speak volumes of where we are as a nation. It’s scary! As is always the case, only a section of the verse is quoted because it serves the nefarious purpose. The verse is willfully taken out of context to manipulate its meaning as was done in the days of slavery. Below is the link to the ProPublica article entitled, “Listen to Children Who’ve Just Been Separated From Their Parents at the Border”; you will hear the audio of the little boy sobbing for his father.
I am a mother of two and I don’t want to imagine what it must feel like for the parents – the pain and helplessness, it must hurt like hell! My children’s experiences pale in comparison to the experiences of the child victims of this current immigration policy. These children are being forcibly ripped from their parents and are being cared for by strangers. Some of the children have no idea what’s going on and they’re not even sure if they will ever set eyes on their parents or guardians again. I cried just thinking about how lonely and afraid these children must feel. It’s anyone’s guess as to when, if ever, these families will be reunited. There is now an executive order to stop separating families. We should also keep in mind that there is no process in place to reunite families. This is going to haunt these families for a very long time.
This cannot be okay with us – we lose our own souls when we just sit and let this atrocity continue. Call your legislators, advocate on Facebook, Instagram and other social media platforms, and/or participate in a protest but don’t just watch. Whatever your platform of choice, please advocate and make a difference. The executive order is just the beginning; all of these families must be reunited and given due process!