The Decision
During the Fall of 2020, I decided to return to school because I have been a registered nurse for a long time, and even though I enjoy working as a nurse executive in health administration and policy, I want the autonomy to practice at the top of my license. I also want to pursue a terminal degree so I won’t regret it later. Even though it had been fifteen years since I graduated with my master’s in public health, I decided to pursue a master’s in nursing to become a board-certified psychiatric nurse practitioner and pursue a doctoral degree later on. In my mind, a stepwise approach. I decided to give it a go.
The Fall of 2020
I got accepted into a program and registered for the first two classes: advanced pathophysiology and pharmacology. I was intimated about taking both classes, so I contacted the program director to inquire about taking one instead. The program director advised that students who took both classes fared better and were often successful in their board certification exams because the courses complement each other and enhance students’ understanding of the core concepts. Despite my increased anxiety, I registered for both classes, and they were the most challenging classes I have taken in my nursing education so far. They are foundational courses, and just like a good, solid house, the foundation must be strong. I wondered throughout the semester why I was doing this, but a close friend encouraged me to reflect upon and memorialize my “why” even before starting the program. I visited my “why” many times during the Fall of 2020. I am also one to ask for help when needed, and that quality contributed to my successful completion of both courses. I agree that both courses are complementary, but I was on to something when I concluded they were highly challenging classes to take together because they have been separated for current students. Nonetheless, I gained confidence in completing the program after completing both classes. It was my defining moment in this new journey.
The Transition
In one of my Spring 2021 classes, one of my professors pulled me aside and suggested that I consider the doctoral program. Her suggestion made sense because I planned to pursue a terminal degree regardless. Before applying to the doctoral program, I ensured that the doctoral degree would not create a barrier to obtaining my advanced practice nursing license. I completed my courses for that Spring semester and started taking some doctoral classes during the Summer 2021 semester. While I enjoyed the learning process, I realized that the doctoral program did not cater to working folks like most of us in the classes. The master’s classes were held in the evenings from four o’clock to half past six, which worked beautifully for most of us because some people worked nights, and most worked during the day shift. However, doctoral courses are offered anywhere between nine in the morning and four in the evening. I realized that this schedule would create significant challenges because the core of my work, including important meetings, occurs between half past eight in the morning and half past four in the evening.
Inequitable Attendance and Program Policies
The DNP and master’s classes had diverse students in age, gender, race, and years of nursing experience. Newly graduated nurses from BSN programs pursued their DNP before their first nursing jobs, and nurses like me have been in the field for almost thirty years comprise the classes. It made for a great and rich learning environment; however, the program policies advantaged some and disadvantaged most middle-aged working people. The strict attendance policies created havoc in our professional and personal lives. We could not be late for any class and could miss only two. I felt like an undergraduate who needed to be micromanaged. Most of us protested against the attendance policies, which have since been changed. Secondly, the DNP program stresses leadership as a core competency but frowns on leadership activities or experiences obtained as part of a student’s job. They require approximately 750 DNP hours to graduate from the program, but you cannot use any activity for which you’re getting paid. For someone like me who is constantly engaged in leadership activities such as attending or presenting at conferences, I cannot get any credit for any of them because most occur during the workday, and I am a salaried employee. That is the equity piece that needs to be included. We are not situated equally – therefore, we should all get what we need to complete this program successfully. The students who do not work can accumulate the DNP hours rather quickly than those who work and have to look for opportunities outside their employment and workday. It’s unnecessarily tedious and inequitable.
My Current Resolve
I vacillated between transferring to another school, calling it quits, or just completing the program; I have decided to complete the program. If I can paraphrase the great William Shakespeare in one of his plays, Macbeth, transferring out would be as tedious as completing the program. I have paid too much money and invested too much time to call it quits. I also don’t give up on anything; therefore, I plan to see this to completion. It also makes me wonder how some of these school program policies contribute to disparities in higher education. Who is better situated to get a master’s level or terminal degree? I will explore this further in part two.